People love having choices. The freedom to choose where to shop, what to buy, how to spend the money we work so hard to earn – it’s all part of being a functional and happy member of society. As a self-proclaimed automotive expert, I am the proud captain of the car-buyer-freedom-act cheerleading squad – which as it turns out, only exists in my mind. Despite this fact, I persevere on, and of course – digress. As a fictional leader in this make-believe movement, I feel that it is my duty to present the fine automotive consumers of America with some hard truths regarding an auto superstore that I frankly cannot stand.
I’m Looking at You CarMax…
CarMax. Let the name sink in as you conjure up your own swirl of emotions regarding this loathsome place. Before we get into the only three reasons anyone should ever buy a car at this big box superstore of Hell, can we please discuss the elephant in the room? No, it’s not the fact that they routinely sell cars with known recalls, or that they make promises that they can’t keep – those seem to be pitfalls of the industry as a whole. The elephant I can’t seem to dismiss from the immature cavern of my mind is that CarMax is based out of Goochland County in Virginia. For you folks that don’t understand, please simply move on and chalk up the last few moments to adolescent banter – I am a Millennial, after all. For those of you who did chuckle, we can still move on, because now that I have called the elephant by name, he seems to be exiting the room.
3 Reasons Why You Should Shop at CarMax
The largest used-car retailer in these United States of America has grown in popularity with automotive consumers since they opened their first location back in 1993. This eyesore of a dealership has nearly 200 locations, and prides itself on the fact that they will buy your car for cash, on the spot. Great, right? As it turns out, it isn’t that great, but we shall go down that rabbit hole another day.
Today, we are here to discuss the top reasons why you should buy your car at CarMax – the crowning jewel of Goochland. Continue on if you are pondering the thought of purchasing a used vehicle at the Walmart of used car lots, before deciding if this decision is right for you.
- You Like to Live on the Edge: Whether that edge is literal or not, you love living out your fleeting days on this Earth on the edge. Your thirst for adventure seeps into every aspect of your life, including your daily commute into the office. Will you make it without breaking down? Maybe. Will you end up on the side of the road without a comprehensive assistance warranty? Who knows. All we do know, is that as a thrill seeker, buying a car at CarMax only makes sense. After all, they are quite popular for selling recalled cars without disclosing that fact. Sounds edgy – right?
- You Don’t Enjoy Good Customer Service: This just boils down to the fact that as a generally agitated person, you enjoy a good dose of asshole reality every now and again. Asshole reality? Can we please make that a thing? Before you dismiss this point as overly judgemental of CarMax, look no further than the one-star rating on the Consumer Affairs website. With more than 500 complaints filed against the used car superstore, it seems that, as the glutton for punishment you are, CarMax is the perfect way to acquire your next used car, truck, or SUV!
- You Have No Interest in Supporting Local Business: As communities across America move more and more toward communion with local small businesses, you stand your ground and remain deeply rooted in global consumerism. That local dealership down the street may have a perfect DealerRater.com score, and come highly recommended by friends and family – but who needs that? Your dollars don’t want to stay local, they want to enjoy the full ride of recirculation throughout these United States of America. To you, I say – stand your ground. Shop at the poorly reviewed big box auto superstore, as you wave your middle finger to the American dream. At the very least, it should really piss off our new president.
If you fit any of the above descriptions, by all means, shop your little used car heart out at CarMax. Be sure to check back and let us know how it goes.